It is an often ignored fact of existence that no matter how relatively well or poorly we are doing …Most humans stay where they are once they get comfortable with it …
The art of doubting and being comfortable
By Royal Hopper
As you approach a traffic light in your worn out but well preserved old dodge on your daily commute to pay the mortgage you slow down and by reflex look to the right.
A man in a white wife beater T shirt legs bent inward stumbles forward in the loose dry dirt toward the peak of the culvert buy the roadway of the huge plain dirt drainage ditch that sits astride a Vegas back road used to get to work, avoid traffic on the strip or on the way to the airport and buy pizza and beer.
It is a strip of sterile dead dirt dotted with the remains of homeless bed rolls, meals drug paraphernalia and sometimes a tent. LVMPD (Metro for short) does a good job running them off but the unfortunate always come back.
This one is shaking off something as he climbs to the top of the tiny dead mound to the side of the road. He looks like a well dressed zombie extra in an appocalypse movie like he has slept for years and is just waking up.
After several moments of zombie like stumbling the man in his dirty jeans and pristine white t shirt reaches and top of the dead dirt culvert and like somebody on the set of a bad appocalypse B Movie has given a que the wind starts blowing …
Right before the light changes for a second you lock eyes ..he looks at you a shrugs and for a moment ..just a moment you are communicating. There you two are a stoned homeless guy in a white T shirt with bent knees stumbling to the top of a dusty dirt drainage ditch culvert and a older dude on his way to work to make sure he has a nice place to hang his hat and a bed to sleep in at night .
One finds freedom and release in indulgence and not having things that tie you down ..the other finds freedom in security and being clear minded and practical and having a permanent place to hang his hat .. both of you seem to have doubts about your choices. Sometimes one wants to run with the wind and get lost in the world and the other sometimes wishes for comfort and security but a roof and neither want to be where the other is …to achieve it …
Just for a moment there is epiphany enlightenment what ever you want to call it for a moment the world seems a little clearer….then the light changes and everything goes back to the way it was as it always does .. One spaces off and goes back into his quiet reverie as the other turns his eyes back to the road as the light changes and drives on to pay his mortgage paying eight hour appointment …
It is a fact of life that many people tend to dtsy exactly where they are because they dont know how to do anything else ….
That is life in the Cuty of Sin and everywnere else ….
Love You Sinners
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