Bison but

This 2,000 pound Bison was seen crossing the road as Bison that weight 2,000 pounds are prone to do_ Royal Hopper

Every tourist trap has its denizen   __ the creatures that locals and those in authority tell you to stay away from.
You see such a denizen preparing to cross the street and it was huge. Its dark brown hair all but covering its intense uncaring brown eyes and it strolled down the asphalt causing fascinated tourists to snap pictures nervously.
The denizen of this tourist trap roadway looks at the gathering crowd of suntan lotion and Bermuda shorts clad tourists and stands fast as one of the curious picture taking tourists inches closer to him to take pictures threatening to provoke this huge browned haired denizen into action.
About that time a patrol car full of authority figures rolls onto the scene points a loud speaker out of the car and says…DSCF0048.JPG
“Stay away from the Bison go back to your cars. It is mating season and the bulls are very aggressive,” the Yellowstone Park Ranger said her voice ringing with authority and some frustration with the
usual perils of tourists screwing with the local denizens. This event occurred during a vacation at Yellowstone National Park but it just as easily could have been in Vegas. Tourists are the same everywhere and every locale has its dangers whether it be 2,000 pound bovines looking for a date or muggers looking for a wallet.

myscle guy on sidewalk

A denizen of Sin City _ Royal Hopper

In another place denizens like mermaids, pirates, giant anthropomorphic Octopi people, Spongebobs,  Captain Crabby and Gilligan stalked the hallways of a local establishment. Tough, tall chicks with colored hair and scars on their tone bodies were everywhere. Dont mess with these chicks boyo …you will lose. One of these chicks carried a black bag laden with suspicious looking weighty objects…
She sets to bag down for a minute looking around to see if anybody is watching and then picks the bag up with some effort and squelches a gasp when several items fall out of the bag fall to the floor.
The tough chick looks panicked and worried as she scurries to pick up the items and local security walks over to sea what this suspicious tough chick with the multi colored hair is doing and unconsciously picks an object off the ground and hands it to the woman. ..
Who says thanks turns three shades red and takes vibrating rounded cylinder and stuffs it back in the bag along with the sports bras and pairs of skates it contained. No not guns or drugs just roller derby stuff..


A blast from the past. The old Riviera was a part of old Vegas.. Now gone the way of the dinosaurs _ Royal Hopper

We went to Yellowstone and then we came back to Vegas. What is the lesson here. Perhaps tht most tourists destinations have some things in common no matter how different they are.
So here are a few rules for visiting anywhere anytime especially the City of Sin.

Rules of Sin in the City

By Royal Hopper
“Where’s my stuff,” the man said looking around the casino with the unmistakeable look the sanity challenged often get when
their invisible friends from the Illuminati steal their magic comb while they are communing with the spirits pf Elvis and Paris Hilton.( Yes I know Paris Hilton is still alive but this gentleman was not so sure.)
“I left my stuff right here,” the man said his wardrobe of casino free giveaways soaked with flop sweat ashe realized his precious stuff was missing.
“I am with Mossad you know,” the man said looking t the security officers who had been called to corral his strange behavior.
“Where I am from people know how to treat a customer.” he said
Trabslation: I left my stuff unattended on a slot machine in Vegas while I went to the bathroom for half an hour and now I am pissed because I know I am an idiot and want you to compensate me for it…
The exchange goes on a a few minutes and finally the casinos order keeper tell the mn he has to go up to his room and cease causing a disturbnce.
“Good idea he says,” with  look of childish excitement on his face, “my stuff might be there.”
On the way up to his room the man suddenly realized his stuff was in the shopping bag he had been holding in his hand the entire time.
In the worn shopping bag nedt to assorted junk, food items and casino gaming tokens was a loaded .40 caliber pistol .
None of this is all that unusual. It is the way it is …It is life in the City of Sin
Love You Sinners Take Care
The rules are as follows.
1.. Abandoned property _ If you leave stuff alone unattended and somebody takes it is your fault and you are not going to get compensated for it.
Don’t leave credits on a slot machine while you go to the bathroom or eat lunch and while some places allow you to reserve a slot machine..
If stuff comes up missing while you are gone you are SOL. TAKE YOUR STUFF WITH YOU You will not get comped if it is gone and security has their hands full keeping the peace
and the slot attendants have their hands full running the slot floor. If your stuff is gone blame yourself.
Casino security has its hands full keeping the peace and keeping an eye on weirdos and drunks like you and doesn’t have time to baby sit you. Take Your Stuff With you or Somebody will take it. If your lucky an alert
security officer might find it first and put it in lost and found but probably not.
2. Showing skin_ If you dress strangely or show some skin you are going to get stared at get over it. Whether its in front of a bubbling geyser or a bank of slot machines if you show skin you are going to get looked at..
Note most tourist destinations will not allow you to roam around shirtless ans yes they can make you leave if you refuse.
3. Bring your freaking ID: While you are not required to show it have to have ity to be where there is gambling or drinking and security
is fully justified in telling you to leave if you dont have it or refuse to show it… That is the law in most places including most National Parks.
4. Somebodys out to get me: I promise you no one is out to get you. Dont mistake our good manners and professionalism for concern about your place in the universe. We just don’t give a crap enough
to single you out. We are not out to get you…
5. Bringing kids to Las Vegas is silly and :: Dont bring you freaking kids to Las Vegas and if you do make note they are not ALLOWED TO STOP OR HANG OUT ON THE GAMING FLOOR …NOT EVEN FOR A minute. Nevada gaming law
clearly states that you kids and anybody under 21-year of age cannot loiter where ther is gambling or drinking. It doesn’t matter who you are your kids cannot be in the casino.
6. Put everybody who needs access to your room on the room registration. If you forget your keys we will not let you in the room unless you are on it.
7. Pay for your room in advance. Rates can change $100 in a day and reservations dont garauntee price…..

Pigeon Zombies and the fallacy of appearances in the City of Sin

pigeon baby.jpg

Pigeon Zombies and the Fallacy of appearances in the City of Sin

By Royal Hopper
A pigeon sits perched on bench during the oppressive sand and concrete covered furnace of a Las Vegas afternoon _ the desert in the summer.
The heat is approaching the danger point and even most of the hard core Sinners have long since scrambled indoors for the benefit of  and air conditioning and ice water. The oppressive clarity of the desert sky highlights every flaw makes the world seem dirty and ragged as the few walking this stretch of urban desertscape take notice of the staring its pigeon disdain at passersby and showing off its pigeon courage by not blinking its pigeon eye one iota when its is approached. DSCF9849.JPG
A few brave pedestrians work up the nerve to approach the unflinching avian but it still doesn’t bat an eye and the walker’s  ultimately lose their nerve and walk on without touching the unflinching bird.
This happens several times and each time the walkers lose their nerve and walk away quickly as if the pigeon had cowed them into it. Then one brave foot bound citizen works up the nerve and determined to get the best of the gray and white bird, extends a hand toward  the bird waiting for it to jump and fly away _ but it doesn’t move.
It just stares wide eyed at the person leaning forward to touch it. Not daunted by this set back the person grabs a small stick and carefully leans forward to poke the bird with the stick determined to get the better of it.
The pigeon is unmoved as the stick inches closer to its head staring right at its antagonist with perfect poise _ not moving and unmoved.
Finally the pedestrian works up the nerve and moves the last few inches to the pigeon’s head and touches it.DSCF9883.JPG
It  still doesn’t move. He slowly and carefully moves the stick back and pokes it again and it still doesn’t move. He works up the nerve again and says boo to the unmoving bird and pokes it again with the stick. It still doesn’t move and never will again. The pigeon has gone to meet its maker on the sun scorched desert pathway and was somehow temporarily frozen in place.
great bird shot.JPG
The pedestrian giggles at their own silliness and its still chuckling when a small group of pigeons fly overhead and he in spite of his new found levity ducks and cringes a bit
Vegas is the kind of place you either love or hate and often both as the case may be….and more to the point it doesn’t give a rat’s ass.
That is life love and summer time in the City of Sin.


Dude or Chick..?? I never got a clear look

Summer in the City

by Royal Hopper
A man stood at the corner looking across the intersection toward his goal. He was like a time machine. His gray pony tail pointing to a forgotten sillier time. The cammo t shirt he wore out of date and out of fashion 30 years ago. What does it mean stayed tuned to find out.
Its was a typical Day in the desert this July 4th weekend.
The city sounded like a war zone as explosions and bright lights rippled through the streets of Sin City as darkness surrounded it.


Las Vegas Cityscape – Royal Hopper

People in strange costumes joined in the celebration whooping and hollering as they explosions of neon echoed throughout the city.
There were drunks everywhere forgetting their wallets in odd places in an effort to get drunk faster. There were cops everywhere keeping a watchful eye on the drunks and those likely to take advantage of them.
There were working girls and you know working girls, winners and losers and some idiot on a horse riding down Tropicana  talking on his cell phone.


Now this is a bad day _ Royal Hopper

In others words it was a normal week in the City of Sin only louder and some guy on horseback on a residential street in Las Vegas which is kind of weird. The 4th of July is a great American holiday full of noise and lights _ but that is how the City of Sin is all the time. July 4th was just every other day except louder and more annoying.
I did see something on the street corner as I was on my way home last week.  A man standing on the street corner caught my eye. Suddenly it was long decades ago and I could feel the long hair on my shoulders and the badly designed t shirts of feaux rebellion.  He wore a pony tail and a cammo tshirt ala Dukes of Hazard.   DSCF9872.JPG
The shirt was faded cammo exactly one I owned some decades  ago.  He looked frozen in time as if 2016 offended him somehow. He bought a really cool cammo shirt back in 1984 and stuck with it and decided 1978 was the bomb for hair styles and stuck with that. Vegas is a lot like that. It constantly promotes its past,  gangsters, Elvis, cowboys and all the glories of the past but never really honors it. Look that place has 60 years of history behind it .._ everyone who was anyone performed there. Babies were conceived there and born there and people died there. It is a piece of history. Want to put a parking lot there ..?.
Thats life in the City of Sin
Take Care Sinners