giraffe
Don’t Pee on Another Man’s Shrubbery
by Royal Hopper

What does it mean exactly when someone says you don’t pee on another man’s shrubbery ?
Well for the man who is convinced someone followed him from a bar into his hotel room and took his wallet, his cash and ..wait for it …his virtue while he slept and believed it enough to tell the tale to police with a straight face it probably means a lot.

This phrase is one I heard while walking my dog in a Sin City suburb has apparently been echoing around the City of Sin like a Renegade Time share salesman. It is the central question of this weeks missive and a phrase with double meanings on many levels.

Yes it is real _ phorto by Royal

Yes it is real _ photo by Royal

What does it mean when you say don’t piss on another man’s shrubbery???
Of course I also heard some anonymous tourists from anonymous Nebraska tell his eager “wingman” about the dangers of pissing on another man’s shrubbery. Wingman as we all know is the nerdier of a pair of guys looking for love, the one who is dedicated to getting his friend some female company for the evening.
This drunken wingman, perhaps acting as the wingman because he was not the brightest bulb in the box seemed to take his friends advice when he stopped in front of a patch of artificial greenery and began to unzip his pants but thought better of it.
It could be he was taking his friends advice or it could be some coherent thought fought through the haze of free beer and two for one shots of Canadian Mist and made him realize he wasn’t in Nebraska in the middle of the night_ he was surrounded by kids and was in a major city and it was the middle of the afternoon. It also could be that the cop peddling by on his bicycle would have arrested his drunken Goober, tractor logo wearing country ass _ but hey what do I know..
Don’t pee on another mans shrubbery could be a warning against peeing on another person’s decorative plants. It could..
cityscape traffic
Apparently this is an old heartland manly truism that has taken hold in the city of sin and soon there will be T-shirts all over Las Vegas Boulevard proudly proclaiming that bit of sage advice..

It advice that one aspiring ladies man could have taken to heart when approaching a two women holding hands in the City of Sin a few weeks ago. The player said something to one of the two women he spotted and the other promptly smacked him across the face like he was a tantrum throwing two year old and she was his angry abusive mother. The slapper grabbed her girlfriend by the arm and strolled off down the Sin City byway..

That life in the City of Sin
Rock On
Ad Sinners

“Don’t pee on another man’s or woman’s shrubbery,”

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