By Royal Hopper
Imagine your sitting next to a giant Latin Bumblebee Transformer, across from a black Spiderman and a drunken old Lady who wonders why the machines in the casino are trying to take her money.
“Why would they do that,” she reportedly said.
Now imagine an argument develops with between the lady and another player and the two superheroes jump to lady’s defense. The other player shouted at the lady in Spanish and the Latin Bumblebee berated the aggressor also in Spanish and Spiderman jumps to both their defenses much like the real Spiderman would have done.
No it’s not a Sci Fi Convention in San Francisco or a action clip from latest superhero sit com. It was and is a normal day in a Las Vegas casino this week in the City of Sin.
People here are into playing games and wearing uniforms. They like traditional kinds of insanity like man sized cartoon superheroes, yellow robotic space aliens and drunken grandmas.
Working conditions matter even to working girls
Imagine two every attractive pros, and in Vegas that means exactly what you think it means, two very attractive pros are standing toe to toe in a Vegas strip casino arguing loudly enough to attract the attention of not one, not two or even three, but four security guards.
The guards stood a few yards distant for the loudly arguing pair to make sure the argument didn’t explode into real trouble. Well, okay the security guards attentiveness might have had something to do with the fact both of these professional pleasure princesses were drop dead gorgeous, wore six inch spike heels and short, short skirts that highlighted the best features on their six foot tall frames.
Apparently the two are partners, business partners I mean and one of them called the other to tell her they had a job, I assume a job together and I assume that they were both going to do what pleasure princesses do for mysterious wealthy men in Las Vegas hotel rooms.
The only problem is when the one got there after walking several blocks (lets call her Valley Girl because she talked like a Val or just Bambi yeah lets call her Bambi) the deed was already done and there was no money to be made.
“Dude,” said the one pleasure princess to the other, “ I walked to (name of casino deleted) that’s messed up.” Even if the use of the word dude by an extremely attractive dark skinned beauty like this wasn’t enough of surprise seeing her face to face with her partner in kissing distance screaming like a banshee was worrisome.
“No not really it was freakin hot…and kind of funny….” They calmed down eventually and went upstairs with dozens of pairs of eyes following them as they walked.
Like I say people here like the wild life but they prefer traditional kinds of insanity especially if it wears six inch spikes and has shapely legs a mile long and very large….eyes.
Down the Street at another Las Vegas Boulevard property a man dressed in strange rags began railing against everything at people walking into the property, shouting about the end of the world and how both presidential candidates are demons from somewhere south of the infernal city of Dis (Dante’s Inferno) Guadalajara or Russell Avenue.
A few days later the same working girls who were shouting at each other earlier in the week are in civies playing slots.
The bald headed player
A young man who was three sheets to the wind four sheets ago spent an hour walking around flirting with every other man under 60 he could find and a few who weren’t batting his eyelids and rubbing his bald head saying something to the effect of.
“Somebody call lady luck and tell her to let me win,” to older guys who were mostly to confused to be angry or uncomfortable.
I guess everybody here loves traditional kinds of insanity and everybody uses cheesy pick up lines on guys…girls…uuhh whatever on people twice their age these days.
Kiss my Butt the Vegas motto—Photo by Royal and Reddy
Lastly thousands of people packed a Las Vegas hotel to play in a Bingo tourney with thousands of dollars at stake as thousands of grandmothers and granddaughters sat side by side blotters (daubers they are properly called) full of rainbow colored ink hovering above their Bingo cards and waiting for the right alignment of numbers and letters to make them a winner slugging whiskey sours and toking oxygen while playing a game that was once the mainstay of church fund raisers.
People here like traditional forms of insanity here and Bingo in Vegas ..well come on…
For brevity’s sake I’m going to include the jogger report in the main body of this week’s column. Mostly they were the ordinary type. Some were the oh crap type. It was as if they suddenly remembered “oh crap jogging is hard I’ll walk.” Then there was the guy who was so inspiring jogging down the street in a full suit of clothes other joggers started to join him in his fully clothed jog fest. He was running for the bus and stopped after half a block when he reached the bus stop.
It rained in the desert this week and made the city muggy and the homeless cleaner, the tourist smellier and water dripped from unseen places in hotels larger than some cities.
Such is life in the City of Sin.
Til next Week
Aint it cool —Photo by Royal